Grumbly Tumbly = Grumpy Gretchen

This time of year becomes very hectic for me.  Long days at work, angry parents that have to pay for their college student's damage billing and staff that is exhausted.  I don't spend enough time with my puppy and work 7 day work weeks.  I have always allowed this time of year to be an excuse for me to just eat crap and be inactive.  It is very easy to come home at night (stripping off clothes on my way to the bedroom to put on pjs) and make a bag of microwave popcorn for dinner (who wants to cook when you get home at 7:30pm?)

Sounds healthy right?  I am determined to make better choices this year. We usually purchase a few lunches for the staff during this time so they don't have to leave the property and can complete the work that needs to be done.  They decided they wanted a burger place that has the best milk shakes......when I placed my order yesterday, I lingered on the milkshake page and tried to convince myself it would be okay.......but then chose not to order one. 

Food prep was hard this week because I got back, from a weekend away, on Monday and didn't have food in my house.  I muddled through on Tuesday and went to the store after work.  I get pretty grumpy if I haven't eaten.  If you add in exhaustion with the grumbly tummy........look out, it is UGLY!  I knew I would need to eat when I got home last night, so I made sure I had some pre-cooked chicken sausages ready to go.  I popped a sweet potato in the oven for tonight and prepped everything I will need to through together a quick dinner tonight. 

 This is what I will be eating for dinner tonight (minus the deviled egg):

http://www.bariatriceating.com/2016/03/easter-dinner-plate-ham-glazed-pineapple/

I was still craving something before bed and I always try to eat protein right before bed so that I don't wake up starving.  so I made this and it was DELICIOUS!!!  I added mini chocolate chips.Seriously, you should try this immediately!  It tasted just like cookie dough and wasn't too sweet.  I am going to try it with chocolate protein powder tonight. Protein packed, but felt indulgent.

http://www.bariatriceating.com/2016/05/easy-everyday-meal-peanut-butter-cookie-dough/

I have to be extra intentional during this time of year to make sure I don't snack mindlessly or choose foods that just are not good choices.  I have to prep lunches and dinners. Breakfast is easy because I have a protein shake and maybe a small piece of fruit or some berries.

So this week the motto is prepare, prepare, prepare! 

Airplane travel = Embarrassment

Airplane travel for obese people can be a very painful experience.  I usually fly Southwest Airlines and have found the customer service to be fantastic.  I don't ever ask for a 2nd seat, the arm comes down and I fit into the space (not always comfortably), but I fit. So, yesterday, when I checked in at the airport, the desk agent asked me if I wanted another seat (they don't charge any longer).  I said, I don't need one.  She said, the flight is fairly full, so I want you to be comfortable, I am going to book a 2nd seat for you.

As I mentioned, I don't ask for one, but when the offer, I usually say okay.  It is just easier than having to deal with the looks of people when the get on the plane and the only seat left is next to me.  The give me a look like I have some type of infectious disease.  I just want to say, don't worry, you can't catch obesity just by our arms touching.  I get it, it isn't comfortable to be crowded in the middle seat, but I do have feelings.

So, here I am, with a reserved seat ticket sitting on the middle seat and they have allowed too many passengers to board and not enough seats.  Apparently, they had 5 crew members on board who were trying to get to their home base.  So, the flight attendant walks by, looks at me and says (not quietly), you have a 2nd seat, right?  I said yes.  This woman, across the aisle from my row, looks over at me in disgust.  I bit my tongue and didn't say anything.  I knew if I opened my mouth, I would have gotten kicked off the plane.  So then, they realize, they still have one crew member who needed to be seated.  The flight attendant asked if it was okay for the employee to seat in the reserved seat.  The man, said he didn't mind at all.  I said, of course I don't mind, I only took the seat to avoid the dirty looks of other passengers.  I also shared with her that she had no idea how rude and mean people could be.  I shared with her the looks I got when she announced I had an extra seat.  She said, are you kidding?  Well those people should look half as good as you do.  She said, honey, you are beautiful, people should be ashamed of themselves.  To be honest, I teared up a little bit. 

Thinner people have no clue what it is like to be large on a plane.  You get into your seat and make yourself as small as you can.  You hate having to ask for a seat belt extender (another embarrassment).  I hated it so much, that I purchased one through Amazon when I flew to Ireland last year. 

We talk to our children about how to deal with bullying, but yet, people don't acknowledge that when you say something hurtful to an obese person, you are being a bully yourself. If we all stopped and thought before we spoke or judged someone, it would be a better world.  When you say something hurtful, you are just adding to the emotional issues someone may have. We all have a history, and you don't know the path someone has had to walk through life. Needless to say, I am looking forward to my first plane ride after surgery.  I can't wait to not need a seat belt extender and to have room in my airplane seat. 

Back to life, Back to reality.......

I had such a great weekend visiting family and good friends.  I was able to connect with two girlfriends from high school, which is always a good time!  I also connected with two women I worked with at a girl scout camp 23 years ago! Such a great weekend!  But now it is time to get back to the grind!  My goal is to lose 20 lbs by October.

I definitely did not follow my plan while I was away.  I ate lots of great food, but most of it was not good for my body.  At least I started each day with a protein shake!  I definitely feel bloated and more lethargic than I had been feeling.  But, I only have me to blame. There is a reason I didn't weigh myself this morning.

My parents were extremely supportive and on the first night home, dad asked if him drinking a soda would bother me.  Then another night, mom asked if it would bother me if she put out Italian bread for dad.  Have I mentioned, I have the most amazing parents??

So I won't beat myself up for my choices the past few days, I will just get back to my routine and hard work to make some real life changes!  So even though my swimming pal won't be there tonight, this big girl is headed to the pool for Aqua Boot Camp...This time of year is busy at work, and I usually use that as an excuse to not eat healthy and not exercise.  This year, IS going to be different.  I have to make the right choices.  So that means, figuring out how to get to strength training at least 2 times a week and in the pool 3 times a week.  That leaves to "rest" days.  On the rest days, I still plan to do something intentional. I also have to start walking buildings/apartments at work, so that will get my steps in daily.  I have to inspect 144 apartments in 33 buildings.  I also use this time to make sure the storage spaces and mechanical rooms are up to my standards.

So.....please feel free to ask me tomorrow if I went to the pool tonight.  I need the accountability!

Out Out Damn Habit........

Well....yes, the past 2 days are not days I would put in the win column.  I have had a change happen in my work world and it has caused me some stress.  But I need to find a different way to cope because the past 2 days I have not made the best food choices.  I have never been one to hold my tongue when I have something to say, but am trying not to stick my foot in my mouth, so I have been suppressing some stuff.  When that happens, I tend to stuff my mouth with crap food...........

I have been working so hard and I won't let this situation completely derail me!  So starting right now, I am going to figure out a different way to cope.

I am glad I am going to my parent's tomorrow for a long weekend......I definitely need to unwind...maybe put my toes in the sand, sit around a fire with good friends and leave some stuff in Baltimore.

I know my head is in a different place because all morning I have been trying to talk myself out of going to strength training tonight.....The struggle is real and I know that having WLS is not going to take that struggle away.  It may be time to figure out how to get BCBS to cover counseling with a psychologist and not psychiatrist.

Weekend Update with Gretchen.......

This past week, I only went to the gym 3 times (twice for circuit training and once for aqua boot camp).  I did some exercising at home, but not enough.  I can honestly say, my body felt it.  I was sluggish and lethargic. I just didn't feel right.  (OKAY, for those of you who said I would notice when I missed a work out, just HUSH!!!!)

Let me be clear, going to the gym isn't something I enjoy, BUT I do like the results.  I didn't realize how differently I have felt since I started intentionally exercising.  Funny how you don't always realize something until you change a behavior that makes your body react negatively. I am actually bummed that my strength training class is cancelled for tonight.  I can feel myself getting stronger, my muscles are not taking as long to recover and I know it is making a difference because my clothes are fitting differently.

So to those who said, suck it up, just keep going, it gets easier, I wouldn't saying it is easier, because when it becomes "easy", we increase the weight, but it isn't as hard as it was the first night I went.  It is also empowering to be with a group of women who know the struggle of being obese and trying to get our bodies healthy.  I would post a pic of our group, but some of the women are in the WLS closet.

Two other things I noticed over the weekend. I tend to skip meals when I am home on the weekends.  This is a big no no when you are trying to lose weight. I may have to start setting an alarm to remind myself to eat.  Skipping lunch often leads to me being incredibly hungry (and grumpy) when it comes time for dinner.  That usually leads to very poor food decisions.  I also don't drink nearly enough water.  I only got in 32 oz yesterday.  No bueno!

My friend sent this to me!  So true.

The second thing I noticed, is that over the weekend my support system is even more important. I need my workout pals to say, even though I won't be there, get your butt to class.  I need my friends to encourage me to make good food choices.  I even stay on the phone with my parents if I am craving fast food so I don't stop.  The people I have chosen to share my journey with, has changed from when I first started in April.  The unfortunate thing is some people will fall out of the circle as the journey continues.  Negativity will not be allowed.  Only people who support me getting healthy allowed!  No food or alcohol pushers please!


 My final weekend update is a scale victory.  I have no idea how different my scale at home is compared to my dr's scale, but when I weighed myself this morning, I was down another 12lbs since July 7th.  Now if my protein powder would just get here so I can continue drinking my shakes in the morning that would be great!

Only 3 work days and then I head to visit my family for a long weekend!

Money, Money, Money........

I am so thankful I have health insurance, and not just health insurance, but insurance that covers bariatric surgery. I have been seeing several people post that they are going to Mexico for the surgery, because they are cash patients, due to insurance not covering it.  Insurance will cover drug rehab, but not a surgery that can reduce further medical issues?  The AMA lists both substance addiction and obesity as diseases, so I am not sure why insurance companies haven't caught up.  Don't get me started on the excess skin removal issue!

Getting healthy isn't cheap, but it is worth EVERY Penny!

The surgery costs around $25,000 (that includes hospital stay, etc.) Thankfully, I will only have to pay my copay of $150.

Let's outline just some of the costs:

1. Gym membership $56/month. Plus any additional classes I may want to take elsewhere or at the gym and have a fee.
2. Protein Powder $33/20 servings.  During the liquid diet phase, you can end up consuming 4 or 5 of these a day.
3. Dr. visits $44 per visit for 6 visits = $264
4. Psych eval: $35 (I got lucky the therapist fought for me and I only had to pay the copay)
5. Vitamins (chewable or liquid for at least 90 days).  We have to take 2 multi vitamins a day and 3 calcium tablets a day.  It is about $23 for a 30 day supply.  I will have to take these the rest of my life.
6. With rabid weight loss, I will need to be replacing clothing as the weight comes off.

I am choosing this path, so I am not complaining, but it takes a great deal of planning and preparing.  I am trying to purchase stuff each pay period to lessen the financial hit.  The good thing is, that during the liquid pre op and liquid post op phase, I won't need to purchase any "food".  

Speaking about money.....I just have to say, I have the 2 most amazing parents.  I am going home next weekend for a visit, which means I have to board my pup ($300).  I planned on paying for the boarding, she is my pup after all.  Dad said, don't argue, we are paying for half because we want to see you.  Mom said, nope, I told dad we are paying the entire boarding bill because you getting healthy and preparing for surgery is more important than us having the $300.  How amazing!  Seriously, I am so lucky in the parent department!  So that meant, I could stock up on some protein powder, order some vitamins and maybe pick up some Isopure water.

Now, if I could figure out a way to get insurance to pay for my required vitamins, that would be great!  Or if I could figure out how to be able to use my medical cafeteria plan to purchase them, that would be good too!

Eating my curds and whey....or at least my whey!

Little Miss Muffit sat on her tuffit.........

A while back I had asked the Facebook world for input on protein powders.  Boy are they expensive!  Unfortunately, most of the brands my friends are using, are whey protein concentrates (much more affordable).  Bariatric patients should only use whey protein isolate.

Let's start by discussing what whey actually is.  Whey is the by product of making cheese.  Yep, cheese.  Once upon a time, it was considered a waste product and today it is recognized as one of the best sources of quality protein.  It is digested and absorbed more efficiently than other other protein.

What is the difference you ask?

• Whey protein isolate (WPI) is processed further than whey protein concentrates (WPC).   This allows the removal of most of the fat and lactose.  WPI is more pure and better absorbed than WPC.

Whey is absorbed at a rate of 8-10 grams an hour where as casein protein is absorb at a rate of less than 5 grams per hour.  So, when you are trying to get in 100 grams of protein a day, whey is definitely the best choice.

Of course you may experience some side effects when you use Whey protein.

• Increased bowel movements
• nausea
• thirst
• bloating
• cramps
• reduced appetite
• fatigue
• headaches

Bariatric patients have to do liquid diets early after surgery and slowly work their way up to solid foods.  Protein shakes are a good way to get in the required protein.  Thankfully, there are tons of companies that make these products.  They have fun flavors like chocolate bliss, peanut butter cookie, peanut butter cup, blueberry cheesecake, pumpkin, etc. If you are looking to add protein shakes into your diet, I recommend getting sample packets if available.

Here are some of the companies I purchase from:
http://www.bariatricadvantage.com/catalog/categoryHandler?cat=Complementary%20Products%20:%20Protein%20Powders%20:%20Nectar&expand=1

http://www.mybariatricpantry.com/Syntrax_Nectar_Protein_s/4.htm

http://www.bariatriceating.com/

http://www.unjury.com/?tag=Bing_Brand&utm_source=Bing&utm_medium=Branded%20Paid%20Search&utm_campaign=Brand

https://chikenutrition.com/


People also get very creative with the protein flavors, here is an example of red velvet dream.  You can add sugar free coffee syrup to them and really change things up!