365 days; 8,760 hours; 525,949 minutes........

On December 2, 2016 I had a life changing experience.  I had weight loss surgery.  I put my faith in my surgeon that he would provide me with a tool that was going to change my life FOREVER!

To say I was nervous, would be an understatement. Even that morning, I wasn't sure I was going to go through with it.  I worked hard from April 2016 until that day to get ready, to change my eating habits, to incorporate physical activity and going to the gym, to get my head on straight and remind myself that I'm worth it. 

I'm under 300lbs for the first time since high school. I feel better, I look better and I'm healthier.  

My transformation allowed me to open up my heart to a great guy, but it also has provided me with the strength and self esteem to not allow people to treat me less than stellar.  I have a right to ask for what I need and want, as long as I am willing to compromise on the small things. I will no longer compromise on things that are important to me just to maintain a relationship.  That is a very different approach for me.  I've always been the person to make things right for everyone else.  To try and make things easier, to take the burden on.  Now this girl speaks up, holds her head high and loves herself more than she ever has.

I've worked hard, but it is time to work harder!  I want to lose another 100lbs in 2018.  That will put me under 200lbs.  I can't even begin to tell you the last time I was under 200lbs.  BUT I WILL GET THERE!  With the support of my friends and family, with the encouragement of my boyfriend and as always with the amazing friends I made through COMP! 

140lbs gone forever, never coming back.  That's an entire person.  HOW did I function with that much more weight on me?

 

NSV Time

So.......the stupid scale is being stubborn, but that's okay.  You know why?  Because I have some pretty cool non scale victories that are happening!  

I've learned that sometimes you need to focus on inches and NSVs and forget about the damn scale!

SOOOOOOO........Here is a small list of the good stuff!

1. On Thursday, I had a pretty shitty day at work, and normally, I would have reached for comfort food.  Some mac and cheese and cheesecake, was what I really wanted.  BUT instead, I went home, talked with my boyfriend and he drove up to comfort me.  Guess what??  Him making the 2 hour drive, holding me, talking through my day and reassuring me was so much better and much more satisfying than cheesecake and mac & cheese.  Who would have thought?  It taught me a valuable lesson about myself AND gave him major boyfriend points.  It's been a long time since I had someone that could help the stress melt away, just by hugging me.
2. I continue to have to adjust my seat in the car AND had to lower my steering wheel this week.  That means my belly is still shrinking. I can even adjust the seat without having to be a contortionist.
3. One of my vendors came into the office yesterday (he hasn't seen me in a few weeks) and commented that I am looking smaller and smaller!
4. I'm fitting into 18/20 clothes and I started at a 30/32.  CRAZY!!!!!!!!
5. I'm able to reach different bits and pieces without having to twist my body or use a mirror to see what I'm doing.
6. I started back at the gym 2 months ago and I have increased my stair walking by 3 landings!

I haven't had my measurements done in a while and really need to see what my inches look like, so I'll be asking a friend to help out!  I can't wait to do my side by side on December 2nd.  (Can you believe it has been almost a year since my surgery?  I can't!)

The boyfriend wants to go skydiving in April (for our 1 year anniversary) and I need to be 250lbs or lighter.  My goal is to be 240lbs. I never thought that goal was even possible....but I'm determined!

I'ts been too long!

 

Sorry it's been so long since I posted!  Life derailed me a bit and I realized I really miss putting my thoughts out there.

 Lately, I've been reading and hearing a great deal of people talking about revision from the sleeve to bypass because they think the sleeve failed.  STOP IT! The only reason for a revision is because medically you need it.  If you stopped losing weight, re-evaluate your exercise and diet!!!

Your sleeve hasn't failed, you have!  Go back to basics, do a reset so you can feel that you still have restriction.  I stopped exercising like I used to and I allowed starches back into my diet. I haven't gained, but I'm not where I should be at 11 months out.  BUT you will NEVER hear me say it isn't my fault.  I decided I could do starches in moderation.  I was wrong, the starches made me stall and I've been detoxing (AGAIN) from them.  Listen, I didn't get morbidly obese because I HATED bread and pasta.  

So, I'm here to say, I'm human, I slacked, BUT I'm baaaacccccckkkkkk!!  

If you are stalled, change up your routine, don't give up!  Do different exercises, eat different food, add more calories or decrease your calories.  Increase fat for a day or two and see if that helps.  Our bodies get comfortable and need to be reminded of the task we are asking it to do.  

I also have to remind myself that the only person I should compare myself to, is me.  Just because some of my friends are at goal at 1 year out, I had over 200 lbs to lose to get to goal.  My body is different and I've done things differently.  I'm a work in progress and that's okay.  I'll continue to surround myself with supportive people, but people who call me out on my shit.  I've lost 135lbs.  that is AMAZING!!!!