Comfort versus Nuture

 Do you know the difference between comforting somone/something and nurturing them?

This is something that I think most of us don't always stop and think about and the result is us being stuck.

We begin to not know the difference, or at least that is true for me.  I have begun to accept comforting words as an acceptable way for someone to reassure me.  Guess what, words are just that, without any action behind them, they don't nurture me in any way.  The words are a bandaide to a larger problem that I allow myself to continue to ignore.

NO more............

Words will no tide me over; actions will be the only way I judge the strength of a relationship.  This includes the crap I do to comfort myself, instead of nuture myself.  Does a brownie, cookie, attention from a man, etc bring me comfort....YEP, just not long term.  I've been working really hard at recognizing which behaviors give me a bump in comfort but causes me to have self doubt afterwards.

I am intuitive and my gut is NEVER wrong.  I have been much more intentional about sitting in silence before I make a decision.  I'm allowing myself to truly listen to my body.  If it gives me pause and makes me uncofortmable, it isn't worth the short lived comfort I would receive.  BUT when I nurture myself, do things that help me grow, provide me emotional stability, I feel fulfilled.  In those moments and behaviors, I feel worthy, I feel authentic.

It is scary when we start to strip away the "ick" and become authentic.  Why is it scary? For me it is because I am becoming more vulnerable.  I'm not hiding behind my weight and co-dependency.  I'm showing people my true self and that is always scary.  What if they don't like me?  But guess what?  I no longer want relationships that are built on false connections.  I no longer want to have friendships that are not authentic.  That isn't fair to me or the other person.  I'm far from truly feeling like I am enough just because I am me, BUT I am working on it.  EVERY single day I work on it.  It's hard work.  But in order to sustain this weight loss and head closer to my goal, it is necessary for me to confront my insecurities.  I need to remind myself that I am perfectly imperfect and that is more than okay!

Looking for ways to nuture yourself?  Check these out......the food options are not options for me because..well obesity and food addiction.  BUT I have recently volunteered with lasagna love and can't wait to provide some home cooked meals for families.  I have currently committed to making 3 meals a month and got my 1st 3 matches just today.

Love and nuture yourself......everyone around you will be better off because of it!

Picture speaks 1000 words.....

 Sometimes I look in the mirror with disbelief!

Dysmorphia is no joke and really messes with your head.  I logically know my body is smaller.  I fit into spaces differently, I fit into clothes differently and my body moves differently,  BUT the mirror is cruel and plays tricks on your mind.  (Okay, your mind plays tricks on itself)

Today, just for fun, I pulled a size L shirt out of my closet.  I put it on and it fit......I wasn't comfortable in it YET (I prefer clothes that don't show off my lumps and bumps, HUSH, I'm working on it.), but it fit.

This journey is crazy and it is definitely more mental than physical.  I have vowed NOT to compare myself to others, because that is not what this is about.  This journey is about me, about self discovery, perseverance, remembering that I AM ENOUGH!  Some people will stick around for the journey and others won't.  And guess what, that's okay!  I will continue to be thankful to all I have crossed paths with.  I have taken something from the encounter and for that, I will be forever thankful.